Friday, 3 June 2011

Shocking Pink Dragon Millipede

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This creature is utterly extraordinary! I should say that "shocking pink" is the name of the colour, presumably because it's at the very least unexpected. I'm a boy so I also think it's garish, ghastly and queasy, altogether yucky just like girls are because they give you the lurgies. It's also completely mad to think that this millipede was first described in 2007 by scientists in Thailand. 2007? Did no-one notice it before? I would've thought that pretty much anything of this colour would feature in ancient myths somehow, even if it's just a cameo shoehorned in to remind everyone of that time they saw that crazy thing crawling about the place like it was normal.

Okay, so this isn't a millipede that electrocutes people. Not literally, anyway. No, it fires cyanide instead. Sure, the pink is shocking, but any bird or whatever that chooses to trifle with this poison packing diplopod is in for the shock of their life... or death. Add the fact that this is a millipede and therefore clambers around the undergrowth feasting on whatever rotting filth it comes across, just like real men, and I may have to reconsider my opinions on the colour pink.

Hmm... further research indicates that this millipede is just so pink and poisonous that it doesn't clamber around in the undergrowth at all, it just sits out in the open looking loud and proud. I really like the idea of clambering around in the undergrowth, though... You see? It's never simple with pink! I'm a MAN! I want to be SIMPLE!

7 comments:

TexWisGirl said...

thanks for the LAUGH!

Crunchy said...

What a fabulous animal. :)

Joseph JG said...

@texwisgirl: I'm glad you enjoyed!

@Crunchy: Definitely! I feel good thinking that creatures like this exist.

Emma Springfield said...

Just from looking at this pink lovely, it would make a nice trim on a collar. I guess the cyanide might make it a bad idea, right?

Joseph JG said...

It would definitely make a wonderful adornment to... probably quite a lot of things. Unfortunately yes, the cyanide makes it a very bad idea indeed. It seems to be one of nice things that we just can't have :(

Anthony Souls said...

Something that decorative must of been seen before, especially if it just lies around in the open, too. Lol.

Maria Thulin said...

Ha ha ha ha ha....

Even though I`m a girl I think it´s a "garish, ghastly and queasy" pink. But rally funny that there´s actually an animal in that colour.

Yeah...it can´t be easy to try to be a simple man :) :) :)

I´ve enjoyed all your texts but this was the funniest so far....