Escape of the Clam

Gosh...

Looks like someone can't wait for 2013 to begin.

Is Faeces Brain Food?

He stood before the crowd with all the casual self-assurance and authority of a good-natured boss sharing a drink with his subordinates. In his hand was a small, brown ball.

"This is poo" he said as he playfully threw the brown ball into the air and caught it, a smile playing on his lips as the crowd chuckled in just the way he knew they would.

Holding the small, brown ball in his thumb and finger for all to see, he went on "and what I want to do today is share my passion for poo with you."

But for one member of the audience, it would never matter how interesting or amusing his talk would be...

"Passion?" said the Dung Beetle. "You call that passion?"

It's Boxing Day

It's Boxing Day, so...

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you have a wonderful day and Santa fills your stocking with so much cool stuff that you would feel guilty were you not having so much FUN!

Santa is looking particularly trim this year, don't you think?

Image: modified from PacificKlaus via Flickr

Hey, he's a Skeleton Shrimp! Hopefully he'll be able to squeeze through a few more chimneys this time!

Christmas Cactus?

Image: Alfiero Brisotto
Alcyonium palmatum

It's a Christmas Cactus! I think... But what's it doing at the bottom of the sea?

Joubin's Squid

Joubiniteuthis portieri

I don't think squid ever get more slim and dainty than this. We're looking at catwalk material here! I hope she doesn't stumble on all those arms.

Ostracod

Image: Daniel Stoupin

Sometimes, don't you just want to wrap yourself up in titanium-reinforced cotton wool and shut the whole wide world out for a little while? Maybe a long while? Let the Ostracod show you how it's done.

Hydnora africana

It's Hydnora africana! A kind of "living dead" plant. Because sometimes you just don't know what's under the earth until it breaks out and stinks the place up.

Diplura

Image: Michel Vuijlsteke

We're going back to the old school! Let's go out to the garden, turn over a stone and learn about a tiny arthropod that deserves at least a little bit of attention.

Remora

Image: mentalblock_DMD via Flickr
Remora remora

Do you have a weird suction cup on your head? Wondering if you can get something out of it other than a lifetime of bullying and misery?

Well have no fear! The Remora is here to show you the opportunities granted to you by your horrific, cranial abnormality! Turn the cruelty of nature to your advantage!

Alien Brain Starfish?

Image: NOAA Okeanos Explorer Program, Galapagos Rift Expedition 2011

I don't know anything about this lump of pink flesh. They claim it's a deep sea starfish... They don't expect us to believe that do they?

It's clearly a brain. A brain unleashed from the dark tedium of a cranium and enjoying its time in the slightly less dark and tedious deep sea. Can't you see it throbbing and pulsating in delight of all the new sensations? It's like a dog with its head out the car window. Especially the tongue. It looks a lot like the dog's tongue.

I wonder what it'll do with all those spinal columns?

Jumping Jesus! It's the Pygmy Mole Cricket!

Image: Malcolm Burrows
Pygmy Mole Cricket
Actually a grasshopper.

Most insects don't like water. For them, falling into a pond is a desperate situation met with avid thrashing and probable death by drowning or getting eaten by something more au fait with the aquatic lifestyle.

So what's a Pygmy Mole Cricket to do? They can't walk on water. They can't swim through water. They can jump really well on land, but what about on water? They can't do that, can they?

Darwin's Frog

Image: Wikipedia
Rhinoderma darwinii

You know when people see a baby and say it's "so cute I could eat him/her/it aaaaaaalll up!" The important thing to remember is that they're not being literal. It's not a threat. They're simply pointing out how soft and tender, how defenceless and technically edible baby is. I guess it's some kind of sick joke. I should put it on my "How to Say Hello" list.